Last Place Wisdom: Chasing After the Wind - Thoughts and a Response
Aaron's trip through the Gauntlet has seemed to be met with pretty much universal interest and acclaim (at least from everyone who listens to the podcast to begin with), and it is pretty easy to see why. Aaron says a lot of things that could raise emotions, both positive and negative, but I think the biggest thing it does is present a picture in someone looking for something (whether Aaron intended it to come across that way is on him). In any case, it seems to be the kind of item that demanded a response, and for myself that needs to take the form of a special off-season Last Place Wisdom.
I can already tell I'm going to face some challenges in writing this response; being honest and helpful, without coming across as dismissive and dick-ish might be a fine line for me to tread. A lot of what Aaron broached was opinion and feelings, and it's hard to criticize that, but his trip through the gauntlet also felt like something more than mere opinion. I apologize in advance if anything I write ends up feeling too aggressive or insulting.
I feel like I can relate strongly with Aaron and much of his life situation. As you might have heard, I have three kids 5 and under (it makes it very hard keeping up with current movies and writing fantasy football blogs). I too have found myself somewhat disinterested in the act of watching sports lately. Outside of the sports I watch with Aiden (him and my shared interest there is the #1 thing keeping me engaged), and following the Blue Bombers, it's more of a background item in my life than something I devote any significant amount of time to. I not only have one "shitty little dog", I have 2 (although I wouldn't use that descriptor myself, I greatly enjoy them and their companionship). I can be jealously protective of my time/to-do list and any attempts to impose upon it; time for myself is as limited as it's ever been.
Despite all the similarities, I have trouble understanding and emphasizing with some what Aaron shared about his response to the toil and pressures that come with being in our situation. This is where part of my potential dickishness could come in; to the extent that the line could blur between Aaron sharing his opinion/feelings about something and me taking it like Aaron is pronouncing judgement on something where he's obviously wrong. I'm not one to be as sympathetic towards a person's "lived experience", and for that reason I'm going to make the rest of the blog post less about Aaron's response which would turn into somewhat of a confrontation, and instead just provide a counter-point from my own life (Don't worry, I'm still going to confront Aaron about one thing and put him on blast by the end of the post). What follows is an indirect response; use it as advice at your own risk or just use it as food for thought.
Before going all serious, Travis' "Jamie" quip during the podcast was pure gold, and could have easily been overlooked, but was part of what made it potentially the best podcast the TFLOEG has ever received.
I love fantasy sports; it stems from my love of games in general. While some people might just see games as a distraction from what really matters, or a suck on ones already limited time, I think games are sacred in a sense because they speak to part of what makes us uniquely human. Animals don't play games, but put any two random children together they will create basic rule sets around play that are at the core of what makes up a game. Modern life has been a progressive series of tearing away any limitation that might be placed on us, where as the core of games are arbitrary limitations we choose to subject ourselves to because there is something about it that makes the experience enjoyable.
I love fantasy sports so much, that I'm co-commissioner/creator of what I would maintain is the premier Season-long CFL fantasy league in existence. There is no website that handles CFL fantasy for you; either you score and track everything by hand, or you do what we did and create an elaborate system of spreadsheets and automated programs that pull stats from the CFL website to create a manageable fantasy experience. It's far more work than most people would put into a game, but the experience and connections it allows me to have are worth the imposition on my time.
My feelings towards fantasy sports exists despite the fact the game itself is mostly frustration. I have never undergone intense losing streaks, so I can't quite relate to Aaron there, however in the 6 years I have been doing CFL fantasy I have come out of the draft as the team to beat every single year, and have lost in heartbreaking fashion on a regular basis. The time I put into it and the results have not lined up, to say the least, but that doesn't matter. Without the time being put into it, it wouldn't exist at all.
I understand that not everyone will feel the need or desire to put as much time into fantasy sports as I do; people are wired different ways. But the thing about it is, I don't feel like it takes up an inordinate amount of time (Karalee might disagree, but only at draft time). Fantasy sports fills the time when my brain has otherwise had enough; podcasts while I'm mowing the lawn or walking the dogs, doing mock drafts in my head when I've had enough of working. Rather than an imposition upon my time or my mental energy, it is something I enjoy and so the time I get to devote to it becomes a joy.
There are a lot of items in everyday life that I have developed this mindset towards. Rather than viewing items I need to address as an imposition on my time, they are realities based on choices and decisions I have made that I have to address. Part of it comes from having a customer service type job where you are facing constant interruptions from clients; I would hate my job if every time someone comes to my desk I had to view it as an imposition stopping me from accomplishing other tasks. I would rather not hate my job, so my mindset changes. I don't know how it's possible to raise children without adopting some form of thinking this way; dwelling on the way kids impose on your life is a recipe for depression.
To get back to fantasy football, the point was raised on the podcast about my feelings towards some of the moves made this off-season. We've seen more moves over a single off-season than we probably have over every off-season combined since Clarke and Travis joined the league, and that's great. It was part of my hope in switching to 2 QB that it would make many more players available to keep, and it's clear that was successful.
It's true that I think some rosters are weaker now than they were at the start of the off-season; most notably John and Clarke. Both of the players are smart guys, so I may be wrong in my assessment of their keepers, but that's my biased perspective. If they feel more confident or more excited about their current rosters, that's great however. Also, take in mind my assessment is solely based on keepers; both John and Clarke have given themselves more high draft picks by their moves and so after the draft things might look different; just keep in mind that high draft picks are only worth anything if you hit on them, and I'm one to know that can sometimes be harder than it seems.
On the flip side, I really like what Dawson, Andrew and Shayne have done about improving their keeper situations. Steve is confusing me about what his plans are, maybe when all is said and done I'll get a better sense of how he's approaching his keepers. Overall, I think the gap between the top and bottom may have narrowed a bit, and that should lead to excitement in order to start the season
I've never really understood the idea of a bucket list. Accomplishments that you check off as you take part in them seem to pale in comparison with the virtues and lived, local environment that one cultivates over a lifetime. Maybe, and this is a potential legitimate criticism that someone taking an in-depth look could raise about me, I just lack ambition for personal accomplishments. Playing basketball against Michael Jordan seems to me like a stupid item to have in consideration when reflecting on one's upcoming death; the same goes for writing a book, joining an organization, reaching some sort of career milestone, visiting some location.
The value that I place on these things is impacted by watching my Dad die at a relatively young age. I don't know if he had any personal regrets at not completing more things on his bucket list (outside of not being able to meet his Grandchildren, but that seems a little deeper than the typical items brought up as bucket list items in this context), but watching his last moments of life and reflecting on the sum of his days following his passing, never once did my thoughts turn to a list of his accomplishment. It was all about the people he cared about and what he was able to build in his ~60 years; it was modest and unimpressive if you're just concerned about listing it all, but of far more worth and value than superficial, ultimately meaningless accolades.
After listening to the podcast and in advance of writing this post, I felt like it would be a good idea for me to read Ecclesiastes; one of my favourite books of the Bible and the inspiration for the title of this post. While some people might find the book and its discussion of meaning (or lack thereof) and the futility of life depressing, I find it to be both true and freeing. If you haven't read it ever or in a while, I recommend it greatly.
However; you need to get over your feeling that the rest of us in the league are imposing on your time by proposing trades to you. Hearing you describe it like you do is a little insulting in my opinion; people want to engage with you and have fun playing fantasy, you complaining about the added "work" you have to do because of it negatively impacts the rest of us. It doesn't take all that much work to receive a trade proposal, think about the value of the players involved and make a decision. If you don't want to get involved in long discussions with counter proposal and multiple players and future draft picks; fine, I would begrudge you that. But just as there are expectations and requirements that come with being a part of anything in our society, a fantasy league is no different. Attend the draft, set a team weekly and try to win, respond to trade proposals; if someone can't meet those small expectations then they do need to reevaluate. I think you're way off in your assessment that you can spend 15 minutes total thinking about fantasy football each season, but I also think that you're way off in the assessment that spending more time than that will stand in the way of you accomplishing bucket list items that you feel are important to you. I think everyone wants you to both stay in the league and to enjoy yourself, but I don't think I or anyone am in a position to offer you advice on what you could do to help achieve both of those. What I will say is this, if you choose to think of fantasy football and the TFLOEG is an imposition on your time, you'll probably never be happy and enjoy the experience. If you choose think of it in any other way; a way to connect with friends that you've made, a reprieve from the thoughts and pressures of everyday life, even as a commitment to something bigger than yourself and your individual goals, your enjoyment and happiness might not change immediately, but the possibility exists that things will improve. Take it for what you will; I think the same thing goes for more than a dumb fake football game as well.
On the next Last Place Wisdom
I can already tell I'm going to face some challenges in writing this response; being honest and helpful, without coming across as dismissive and dick-ish might be a fine line for me to tread. A lot of what Aaron broached was opinion and feelings, and it's hard to criticize that, but his trip through the gauntlet also felt like something more than mere opinion. I apologize in advance if anything I write ends up feeling too aggressive or insulting.
I feel like I can relate strongly with Aaron and much of his life situation. As you might have heard, I have three kids 5 and under (it makes it very hard keeping up with current movies and writing fantasy football blogs). I too have found myself somewhat disinterested in the act of watching sports lately. Outside of the sports I watch with Aiden (him and my shared interest there is the #1 thing keeping me engaged), and following the Blue Bombers, it's more of a background item in my life than something I devote any significant amount of time to. I not only have one "shitty little dog", I have 2 (although I wouldn't use that descriptor myself, I greatly enjoy them and their companionship). I can be jealously protective of my time/to-do list and any attempts to impose upon it; time for myself is as limited as it's ever been.
Despite all the similarities, I have trouble understanding and emphasizing with some what Aaron shared about his response to the toil and pressures that come with being in our situation. This is where part of my potential dickishness could come in; to the extent that the line could blur between Aaron sharing his opinion/feelings about something and me taking it like Aaron is pronouncing judgement on something where he's obviously wrong. I'm not one to be as sympathetic towards a person's "lived experience", and for that reason I'm going to make the rest of the blog post less about Aaron's response which would turn into somewhat of a confrontation, and instead just provide a counter-point from my own life (Don't worry, I'm still going to confront Aaron about one thing and put him on blast by the end of the post). What follows is an indirect response; use it as advice at your own risk or just use it as food for thought.
Before going all serious, Travis' "Jamie" quip during the podcast was pure gold, and could have easily been overlooked, but was part of what made it potentially the best podcast the TFLOEG has ever received.
I love fantasy sports; it stems from my love of games in general. While some people might just see games as a distraction from what really matters, or a suck on ones already limited time, I think games are sacred in a sense because they speak to part of what makes us uniquely human. Animals don't play games, but put any two random children together they will create basic rule sets around play that are at the core of what makes up a game. Modern life has been a progressive series of tearing away any limitation that might be placed on us, where as the core of games are arbitrary limitations we choose to subject ourselves to because there is something about it that makes the experience enjoyable.
I love fantasy sports so much, that I'm co-commissioner/creator of what I would maintain is the premier Season-long CFL fantasy league in existence. There is no website that handles CFL fantasy for you; either you score and track everything by hand, or you do what we did and create an elaborate system of spreadsheets and automated programs that pull stats from the CFL website to create a manageable fantasy experience. It's far more work than most people would put into a game, but the experience and connections it allows me to have are worth the imposition on my time.
My feelings towards fantasy sports exists despite the fact the game itself is mostly frustration. I have never undergone intense losing streaks, so I can't quite relate to Aaron there, however in the 6 years I have been doing CFL fantasy I have come out of the draft as the team to beat every single year, and have lost in heartbreaking fashion on a regular basis. The time I put into it and the results have not lined up, to say the least, but that doesn't matter. Without the time being put into it, it wouldn't exist at all.
I understand that not everyone will feel the need or desire to put as much time into fantasy sports as I do; people are wired different ways. But the thing about it is, I don't feel like it takes up an inordinate amount of time (Karalee might disagree, but only at draft time). Fantasy sports fills the time when my brain has otherwise had enough; podcasts while I'm mowing the lawn or walking the dogs, doing mock drafts in my head when I've had enough of working. Rather than an imposition upon my time or my mental energy, it is something I enjoy and so the time I get to devote to it becomes a joy.
There are a lot of items in everyday life that I have developed this mindset towards. Rather than viewing items I need to address as an imposition on my time, they are realities based on choices and decisions I have made that I have to address. Part of it comes from having a customer service type job where you are facing constant interruptions from clients; I would hate my job if every time someone comes to my desk I had to view it as an imposition stopping me from accomplishing other tasks. I would rather not hate my job, so my mindset changes. I don't know how it's possible to raise children without adopting some form of thinking this way; dwelling on the way kids impose on your life is a recipe for depression.
To get back to fantasy football, the point was raised on the podcast about my feelings towards some of the moves made this off-season. We've seen more moves over a single off-season than we probably have over every off-season combined since Clarke and Travis joined the league, and that's great. It was part of my hope in switching to 2 QB that it would make many more players available to keep, and it's clear that was successful.
It's true that I think some rosters are weaker now than they were at the start of the off-season; most notably John and Clarke. Both of the players are smart guys, so I may be wrong in my assessment of their keepers, but that's my biased perspective. If they feel more confident or more excited about their current rosters, that's great however. Also, take in mind my assessment is solely based on keepers; both John and Clarke have given themselves more high draft picks by their moves and so after the draft things might look different; just keep in mind that high draft picks are only worth anything if you hit on them, and I'm one to know that can sometimes be harder than it seems.
On the flip side, I really like what Dawson, Andrew and Shayne have done about improving their keeper situations. Steve is confusing me about what his plans are, maybe when all is said and done I'll get a better sense of how he's approaching his keepers. Overall, I think the gap between the top and bottom may have narrowed a bit, and that should lead to excitement in order to start the season
I've never really understood the idea of a bucket list. Accomplishments that you check off as you take part in them seem to pale in comparison with the virtues and lived, local environment that one cultivates over a lifetime. Maybe, and this is a potential legitimate criticism that someone taking an in-depth look could raise about me, I just lack ambition for personal accomplishments. Playing basketball against Michael Jordan seems to me like a stupid item to have in consideration when reflecting on one's upcoming death; the same goes for writing a book, joining an organization, reaching some sort of career milestone, visiting some location.
The value that I place on these things is impacted by watching my Dad die at a relatively young age. I don't know if he had any personal regrets at not completing more things on his bucket list (outside of not being able to meet his Grandchildren, but that seems a little deeper than the typical items brought up as bucket list items in this context), but watching his last moments of life and reflecting on the sum of his days following his passing, never once did my thoughts turn to a list of his accomplishment. It was all about the people he cared about and what he was able to build in his ~60 years; it was modest and unimpressive if you're just concerned about listing it all, but of far more worth and value than superficial, ultimately meaningless accolades.
After listening to the podcast and in advance of writing this post, I felt like it would be a good idea for me to read Ecclesiastes; one of my favourite books of the Bible and the inspiration for the title of this post. While some people might find the book and its discussion of meaning (or lack thereof) and the futility of life depressing, I find it to be both true and freeing. If you haven't read it ever or in a while, I recommend it greatly.
I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. 13 That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God. - Ecclesiastes 3:12-13I teased earlier that I was going to put Aaron on blast, so here is the direct response: Thanks for sharing your thoughts about what you look for out of fantasy and the things going on in your own personal life. It really has helped me understand you better. I was utterly confused by your suggestion to hold a year of jubilee; yes it would make the draft more exciting that one year, but it would ruin the fun that is had by building a team outside of the draft through trades and future predictions. I thought your suggestion was about leveling the playing field and making it possible for more teams to compete, and so I looked for ways to allow for that while still keeping the best parts of building a team (part of my goal with switching to 2 QB). The fact that you just don't enjoy trading and all that it involves is totally alien to my way of thinking, I'll try to be understanding of that.
However; you need to get over your feeling that the rest of us in the league are imposing on your time by proposing trades to you. Hearing you describe it like you do is a little insulting in my opinion; people want to engage with you and have fun playing fantasy, you complaining about the added "work" you have to do because of it negatively impacts the rest of us. It doesn't take all that much work to receive a trade proposal, think about the value of the players involved and make a decision. If you don't want to get involved in long discussions with counter proposal and multiple players and future draft picks; fine, I would begrudge you that. But just as there are expectations and requirements that come with being a part of anything in our society, a fantasy league is no different. Attend the draft, set a team weekly and try to win, respond to trade proposals; if someone can't meet those small expectations then they do need to reevaluate. I think you're way off in your assessment that you can spend 15 minutes total thinking about fantasy football each season, but I also think that you're way off in the assessment that spending more time than that will stand in the way of you accomplishing bucket list items that you feel are important to you. I think everyone wants you to both stay in the league and to enjoy yourself, but I don't think I or anyone am in a position to offer you advice on what you could do to help achieve both of those. What I will say is this, if you choose to think of fantasy football and the TFLOEG is an imposition on your time, you'll probably never be happy and enjoy the experience. If you choose think of it in any other way; a way to connect with friends that you've made, a reprieve from the thoughts and pressures of everyday life, even as a commitment to something bigger than yourself and your individual goals, your enjoyment and happiness might not change immediately, but the possibility exists that things will improve. Take it for what you will; I think the same thing goes for more than a dumb fake football game as well.
On the next Last Place Wisdom
- My draft strategy and sleeper list is revealed in my official mock draft special
- I stop focusing on fantasy football entirely and just share my thoughts on life and everything it entails.
- The blog season officially begins with my draft recap and thoughts for the upcoming year.
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