Power Powell Rankings: Week 9 - A Common Bond.
I've been on call for almost eight days straight and I'm starting to go cross eyed. I'm not anxious about getting called out while I'm awake or my ability to fix an outage when I'm woken up. It's the fact that I don't particularly enjoy being jolted out of sleep, least of all by electronics. Mr. Milo has become my alarm clock in the mornings as he wants to be fed at four A.M sharp and I feel I might as well get up and make my day a productive one. However, when I'm on call I wake myself up thinking I hear my phone go off and rather then an attractive sounding four A.M. I wake Mr. Milo up at two-thirty or three. Now, typically I spend my mornings with the same routine as I feel it's good to have certain things set in stone: pre-workout drink, check fantasy bullshit, work out, smoothie, read/write and then I make my way to the office for a hard day's work. With these extra hours screwing around with my internal clock and scheduled routine I've been forced to add something to the mornings activities (although this morning I was actually called out so I didn't have enough time to write these rankings before work, isn't it ironic?) to fill them out. Enter a hero! Not just any hero, my favourite one. Bond, James Bond. I'm working my way through this epic time capsule of western culture that has spanned more then five decades. Through all the misogyny, psychotic tendencies and taboo sex laws I've seen parallels between Bond and our league. There's some near perfect movies and some severely flawed films much like the teams in TFLOEG, take a look:
1. NFL OWNER (Last Week 1): Shayne's team is still cruising and, as I stated last week, it seems The World Is Not Enough for Shayne who will be eligible to plug Josh Gordon into his flex in a couple weeks.
2. Sideliners (Last Week 3): Steve came out successful in Brother Bowl 2014. His team is looking strong going into the playoffs as long as his quarterbacks have their Golden Guns firing those sweet, sweet TDs.
3. The Keith-glorious Basterds (Last Week 4): Keith is continuing to win despite Brandon Marshall's struggles. His hot/cold quarterback combo is enticing (read: Luck) and hard to watch (read: Stafford). Despite all this, Keith has made the right moves to stay ahead of the competition and has A View To A Kill for the league trophy.
4. The Fear Boners (Last Week 2): "I'm bleeding chips" but luckily I got Aaron and Andrew to stake me some key players via trade and hopefully a win this week against Stan will give me a Quantum of Solace in this manic league of record. Sneaky Prediction: DeAngelo Williams will have a hundred yard/two touchdown performance on Thursday Night Football.
5. NINERS (Last Week 7): Stan put up a great win against the surging Aaron "Primetime" Clappertons last week. It's not breaking news by any stretch to tell you that Stan has had RB troubles since ADAP's leave of absence, but it looks like he has done the near-impossible by finding some gems in the waiver wire. Diamonds Are Forever, but time will tell if the Jaguar's Offensive Weapon and The New Toast of Minnesota are reliable enough to make a playoff push!
6. Aaron "Primetime" Clapperton (Last Week 5): Aaron lost, but I'm willing to bet that seeing how quickly a darkhorse can fall from the lime light "will scare the Living Daylights out of him." We have to see how he reacts.
7. Oh That's Nasty (Last Week 6): Dawson is missing his Vesper Lynd on his team with A.J. Green on the injury report. However, once he returns expect him to shake up the middle of the standings and turn the fight for those final playoff spots into a true Casino Royale!
8. BISP (Last Week 8): Mike is continuing his prophesy of winning out with an insane point total this week against a strong showing from Andrew. Mike is living proof that he is still on the edge and is hellbent to Die Another Day!
9. RW Throws A Sexy Deep Ball (Last Week 9): Andrew is cursed. We originally thought it was in the form of Warlock Aaron, moved on to Warlock John and both theories have dissipated in the poor showings from both those teams last week. The answer must be the voodoo curse put on Andrew by an unknown Baron Samedi fan who is working behind the scenes. You put up 162 points and lose? Time to find your Solitare and find out who this voodoo whodoo is.
10. What Are The Chances (Last Week 10): Shayne was two yards away from putting a 100 point lap over Curtis' squad. Curt has been known not to favour seafood and his team looks to have a similar squeamishness as it looks as though the swallowed a whole Octopussy and have turned a shade of green in the face. Sneaky Prediction: Curt can look forward to one final win before the end of the season, as You Only Live Twice.
There you have it fellas, albeit with less babes, bullets and brawn. Fits into TFLOEG just fine that way though if you ask me. Bonus Points for matching the bodies with the heads in this weeks rankings photo.
-The Commish
1. NFL OWNER (Last Week 1): Shayne's team is still cruising and, as I stated last week, it seems The World Is Not Enough for Shayne who will be eligible to plug Josh Gordon into his flex in a couple weeks.
2. Sideliners (Last Week 3): Steve came out successful in Brother Bowl 2014. His team is looking strong going into the playoffs as long as his quarterbacks have their Golden Guns firing those sweet, sweet TDs.
3. The Keith-glorious Basterds (Last Week 4): Keith is continuing to win despite Brandon Marshall's struggles. His hot/cold quarterback combo is enticing (read: Luck) and hard to watch (read: Stafford). Despite all this, Keith has made the right moves to stay ahead of the competition and has A View To A Kill for the league trophy.
4. The Fear Boners (Last Week 2): "I'm bleeding chips" but luckily I got Aaron and Andrew to stake me some key players via trade and hopefully a win this week against Stan will give me a Quantum of Solace in this manic league of record. Sneaky Prediction: DeAngelo Williams will have a hundred yard/two touchdown performance on Thursday Night Football.
5. NINERS (Last Week 7): Stan put up a great win against the surging Aaron "Primetime" Clappertons last week. It's not breaking news by any stretch to tell you that Stan has had RB troubles since ADAP's leave of absence, but it looks like he has done the near-impossible by finding some gems in the waiver wire. Diamonds Are Forever, but time will tell if the Jaguar's Offensive Weapon and The New Toast of Minnesota are reliable enough to make a playoff push!
6. Aaron "Primetime" Clapperton (Last Week 5): Aaron lost, but I'm willing to bet that seeing how quickly a darkhorse can fall from the lime light "will scare the Living Daylights out of him." We have to see how he reacts.
7. Oh That's Nasty (Last Week 6): Dawson is missing his Vesper Lynd on his team with A.J. Green on the injury report. However, once he returns expect him to shake up the middle of the standings and turn the fight for those final playoff spots into a true Casino Royale!
8. BISP (Last Week 8): Mike is continuing his prophesy of winning out with an insane point total this week against a strong showing from Andrew. Mike is living proof that he is still on the edge and is hellbent to Die Another Day!
9. RW Throws A Sexy Deep Ball (Last Week 9): Andrew is cursed. We originally thought it was in the form of Warlock Aaron, moved on to Warlock John and both theories have dissipated in the poor showings from both those teams last week. The answer must be the voodoo curse put on Andrew by an unknown Baron Samedi fan who is working behind the scenes. You put up 162 points and lose? Time to find your Solitare and find out who this voodoo whodoo is.
10. What Are The Chances (Last Week 10): Shayne was two yards away from putting a 100 point lap over Curtis' squad. Curt has been known not to favour seafood and his team looks to have a similar squeamishness as it looks as though the swallowed a whole Octopussy and have turned a shade of green in the face. Sneaky Prediction: Curt can look forward to one final win before the end of the season, as You Only Live Twice.
There you have it fellas, albeit with less babes, bullets and brawn. Fits into TFLOEG just fine that way though if you ask me. Bonus Points for matching the bodies with the heads in this weeks rankings photo.
-The Commish
The biggest problems to my fantasy season has been the fantasy schedule. My team has met competition that has put up 30pts/week more than Shayne has. Even with his high scoring team, if he had faced my schedule he would have 2 less wins and be sitting at 4-4. Everyone brings out their best against me.
ReplyDeleteAnd if I played Shaynes schedule, I would be 5-3.
ReplyDeleteCertainly not disputes there. How every single team that you go up against has their best week certainly defies logic. In the absence of logic, I blame Voodoo. I'm shocked you haven't guessed the bodies underneath Aaron and I yet, they're two of your favourites if I remember correctly?
ReplyDeleteAndrew I don't agree with you that I would be 4-4 as I change my line up depending on the match ups every week so I probably would have different players in my line up. I know that I will probably lose this week but I'm crunching the numbers and working my butt off to get er done!!
ReplyDeleteMr. Kidd and Mr. White was the answer i was looking for.
ReplyDeleteI don't get what you are saying Shayne? Are you telling me you do your lineup depending on your fantasy match-up and not the real game match-up? Your 4-4 record with my schedule is taking your fantasy points every week and then seeing if you scored more or less than who I matched up with that week. Simple as that.
ReplyDeleteShaynes team has been a juggernaut but I'm saying fantasy schedule has a lot to do with win/loss regardless of how good the fantasy manager is.
ReplyDelete